the.goldbrick

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A case of confusion at Kor Tor Mor, Phuket Town

When you enter this nightclub called Kor Tor Mor, there is a glass case on the left-hand side. In it, is a collection of fake passports, fake IDs, and all the brews pictured below. One would think that they’d be available for purchase at the bar. However, that’d be an incorrect assumption as all of the following: Sierra Nevada Pale Bock, Anchor Steam, Brooklyn Lager, Elephant, Red Brew-ster, Corona, Sol, Humboldt Gold Rush, Strongbow, Grant’s Weis Beer, Broken Hill, Holsten, Odoul’s (?), Bicycle, Miller Genuine Draft, Simpatico, Beck’s, Grolsch, Point Special, Saint Andrews, Coors Dry, Carlsberg, Olympia, and Bud Light…are for display only.

I’m not saying all of those are choice selections by any means, but you have to understand what life is like as a beer drinker (or former beer drinker as it is now!) in the Land of Smiles. It took a lot willpower not to smash that glass to get my hands on the Sierra Nevada and Anchor Steam bottles though. Lookin’ about 10 years old or more, definitely not the taste that was intended when it was crafted and a possible risk of digesting some bacteria that has been growing inside; don’t care and totally worth the gamble were I able to down one. Alas, I couldn’t get my hands on them and was forced to bow my head in disappointment, belly up to the bar and weep over the lager-dominated choices presented to me here in Thailand that include Siamsato, Heineken, Cheers, Asahi, Chang, Leo, Archa, Singha, Tiger, and San Miguel Light. Fuck me.

This is the single worst tradeoff made for living abroad here in Southern Thailand. A taste of some supremely-delicious Sweetwater from good ol’ Georgia would be unimaginably perfect right about now. Goddamn I miss home.

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